@NanoRaptor *frustratedly looks for the 'immediate' option despite there being no 'immediate' option.

@NanoRaptor they are support not to beep?

@NanoRaptor About half an hour... except we have a chirping smoke detector that's been going for over a month, and it's behind a locked door in the basement that none of us has access to.

@NanoRaptor I have no smoke detector, but if I did the answer would be within a day.

@NanoRaptor weirdly this is one of the things that cuts through my ADHD. I guess it happens infrequently enough for my brain to consider it novel, and since mine are also mains backed (the battery is to keep it working if the power goes out) and linked together the failure case when a battery dies is that the alarms all go off, on three floors, so that very much tickles the urgency button.

@NanoRaptor as this always happens in the middle of the night and also only for the one in the bedroom... Immediately! Or at least, I will take them down immediately and place them somewhere convenient, to replace the battery later... When I get to it... And when I have bought new batteries... And feel like it... And the pile of disfunctional smoke detectors starts bothering me.

@NanoRaptor

About 3 seconds.

@NanoRaptor immediately.

@NanoRaptor Shortly after the fire.

@NanoRaptor "yanking out the batteries immediately" should be an option. Previous apartment had the smoke detector right above the stove, it would go off constantly when cooking.

@NanoRaptor « [✔️] What is a `smoke detector'? »

(in my defense, these are not mandatory in private homes in Switzerland; the one at work are mains powered and connected to the emergency power network)

@NanoRaptor

I take it down immediately. If I don't have a spare battery, I'll buy one within a couple of days.

@NanoRaptor it’s… hardwired and probably because of lose regulations it does not have a battery sooo :)))

@NanoRaptor That reminds me of the first time this happened to me and for a whole week I tried to find the cricket hiding in my bedroom. And of course I had to call an exterminator to tell me where that sound _actually_ came from 😅

@NanoRaptor https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYTRBt0aNbM

@NanoRaptor Picking a week because there's no "immediately" option. I can't stand noises that aren't supposed to be there.

@NanoRaptor On the second beep.

@NanoRaptor Oh, that beeping? It's one of the smoke detectors upstairs, but I don't know which one. It'll beep again when I'm up there, but there are other ones up there, so we're covered. No need to get worked up...

@NanoRaptor

Missing option: within 45 seconds

BECAUSE I HATE THAT FREAKING BEEPING!!!

@NanoRaptor
It only takes a beep or two before I make it stop, after which it might be a couple years before I put batteries in.
(I do also have hardwired detectors, and we replaced the busted one that just shouted in distorted French when it was plugged in)

@NanoRaptor well, the battery itself: like a year. the detector goes down and battery-less in less than 5s; I WFH.

@NanoRaptor Basically as soon as the chirping gets frequent enough that I can locate which detector is making the noise. With one in each bedroom and an additional one per floor, it can be hard to find the offender when the chirp is just occasional.

@NanoRaptor instantly

@NanoRaptor Immediately! My smoke alarms chirp and say “Low battery!” very, very loudly. And, as per Murthy’s laws, it always starts at 2 a.m.

@NanoRaptor if i could, i would be replacing it immediately. Ontario law says tenants cannot replace batteries in smoke detectors, so we have these sealed 10-year things that nobody checks. so much safer when i can't replace a battery myself and have to rely on landlord asshole scheduling for someone to come and do it for me! what could go wrong?

@NanoRaptor Two beeps in and I’m getting the ladder, I’m triangulating which demon machine it is by the fourth.

@NanoRaptor I am not sure if my smoke detector is beeping or not. I cannot hear it from the bottom of the pond where I frisbee like threw it the last time it went off at 3am.

@NanoRaptor chaos mode: take down and never put it back up:

@NanoRaptor I scramble to replace it as soon as I hear it. My poor dog gets scared and tries to hide from it by burrowing into places it's really hard to get her out of

@NanoRaptor
Many years ago while living by myself I woke one morning to find a ball of tea towels and gaffa tape hanging from the ceiling. I could loosely recall the smoke alarm waking me up over night. Needless to say, the battery was quickly replaced.

@NanoRaptor
Bought one of those talking ones with a sealed battery - it malfunctioned that same evening, just after the stores closed.

No way to silence it, no way to remove the battery, I had to squash it under a pillow in the basement so we could get some sleep.

The next day at the returns counter BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP FIRE! FEU! BEEP BEEP BEEP

"Reason for return? Oh."